Kat Cheesebro wasn't sure how this talk with her father, Cory, would go.
In the summer, following one of her AAU tournaments, Cheesebro sat down with him on the couch for an important conversation about a decision she had been mulling for months. She had already discussed it with her mother, Karen, but telling Cory — who had coached her since fourth grade and who, with Karen, had spent countless hours and dollars supporting her basketball career — would be different.
Through worry, Cheesebro told him: She didn't want to play college basketball.
"I'm not an emotional person, really, like, at all," she said. "So telling him — I broke down crying. I was very emotional during it because I didn't want to upset him and make him think less of me for not wanting to play."
It's rare for a player of Cheesebro's stature to opt out entirely. She's a 1,400-point scorer ahead of her senior season, one of the best players in the MIAA and New England at large, and primarily responsible for the dramatic turnaround of Dartmouth girls basketball. Cheesebro certainly has the talent to reach the next level. She had plenty of Division 2 and 3 interest and believes that if she had wanted to, she could have reached out to more coaches and landed a mid-major Division 1 scholarship.
Instead, she's deciding to experience college on her terms, and she has her family's full support.
"I think Karen and I both have always said, 'Katherine, if it's not going to make you happy at the end of the day, don't do it,'" Cory said. "We're not the ones that have to wake up at five o'clock in the morning to do the workouts, then go to school, then do some more workouts. It's a big commitment, and a lot of people have told us (with) commitments and things like that, you've got to do it to make you happy."
Cheesebro plans to major in biomedical engineering and aspires for a career helping develop prosthetics. In middle school, her parents signed her up for a one-week robotics workshop at UMass Dartmouth, and it sparked a passion for the field. But biomedical engineering wasn't a common offering among Division 1 schools. It's also a difficult, time-consuming degree.
In May, Cheesebro went on several college tours (not unofficial visits) at schools around New England, including UConn, UMass, Northeastern and more. She could picture herself at a large school but knew it'd be hard to make teams and earn playing time at some of these Div. 1 programs. More importantly, Cheesebro knows playing college basketball requires a massive commitment. She’d think about playing on a club or intramural team, but she wants time to explore all of what college life can offer.
"I want to experience everything in college, and I feel like I can't do that with just playing college basketball because it really limits you," she said. "You have to really eat, sleep, breathe basketball if you want to play at any level."
Cheesebro plays three sports at Dartmouth. Soccer and lacrosse help keep basketball from consuming her focus so she's fresh by the time she gets to the winter season or AAU season. Cheesebro said she didn't feel burned out by the sport and praised her travel experiences with the Honey Badgers. If she had to do her entire basketball career over, she wouldn't change a thing because of the places it took her and the friends she made on the journey.
Still, as June arrived, she contemplated the idea more seriously, and by the end of the grassroots summer, she had made up her mind. Then Cheesebro sprained her ankle playing in Louisville and got a nasty case of food poisoning during her last tournament in Chicago.
"I probably, in total, between those two tournaments, missed a total of, like, six games," she said. "And I feel like that kind of made me also realize that — it was almost like a sign. I knew what I wanted to do, but I needed a sign to show that that's what I want to do."
So how was the talk with her father?
"I gave her a lot of credit for making such a tough decision at 17," Cory said. "I said, 'Kat, this might seem like this is the toughest decision that you're ever going to make. You're going to look back at this 20 years from now, and this is just the first of many tough decisions that you're going to have to make. And to be able to do it at 17 and have a solid head on your shoulders and have a plan… You're smarter than me. Hats off to making the decision.' We hugged, and you could just tell there was some weight, because she didn't want to disappoint us."
Between signing Cheesebro up for AAU teams and camps, and traveling around the country to watch her play, Cory and Karen have put tens of thousands of dollars towards basketball and the possibility that it could lead to a college scholarship. Like Cheesebro, they have no regrets.
"Those were our trips at the end of the day, right?" Cory said. "I mean, yeah, they were more expensive trips than maybe most trips, but I would say at the end of the day, we do have a lot of good memories. Even when (Kat) told us, I said, the time that we got to spend in those summers, I'll never forget. Those are the things that I probably cherish the most, and I think my wife would say the same thing."
One hard part for Cheesebro, however, has been relaying her decision to her community.
Last year, Cheesebro averaged 27.3 points, 7.9 rebounds, 3.1 assists and 3 steals. Dartmouth went 19-4, won its first Southeast Conference championship and beat league rival Bridgewater-Raynham for the first time in 10 years, with Cheesebro dropping 41 points in that victory. Her achievements have made her a figurehead for the school and town. People who saw her in the newspaper or in highlights have asked her about her future plans and were surprised when she couldn't give a clear answer.
"They almost put it down in a way. They're like, 'Are you seriously not going to play?' And I feel like they don't really understand because a lot of people, if they had the opportunity to play a sport in college, they would," Cheesebro said. "But I feel like for me, as a woman, there's a bigger picture than that, because at the end of the day, basketball ends at some point. Especially with what I want to do, I'm gonna have to put a lot of time and effort into that major."
Cory tells his daughter that those critics only see Cheesebro when she's suiting up for Dartmouth. They don't see the early-morning workouts before school or the camps she's worked at to help lift up girls around her.
"They just think very highly of you, that you are a very gifted player. Don't take it negative, like you're letting down the community," Cory said. "But then also, just remember those who truly know you in the community that have seen you outside of basketball. You're laying a really solid foundation."
Cheesebro’s attention is on her last season of high-level basketball. She's added extra workouts because she wants to check off her remaining goals: setting Dartmouth's new all-time scoring record (approximately 1,820 points) and leading her team far in the playoffs.
"I want people to know that, just because I'm not gonna play at the college level, doesn't mean that I'm not gonna put so much work and effort into the senior season," she said. "I want to kind of go out with a bang."
Cheesebro doesn't know yet what those last games might feel like. Neither does Cory. He started coaching Cheesebro on her fourth-grade Dartmouth travel team that lasted through middle school. They talk about the WNBA and basketball all the time. Cory and Karen have had a front-row seat to their only child's rise.
It's why Cory, who repeatedly said he's not outwardly emotional, couldn't hold back tears. Parenting a high school senior already marks a final chapter. Now he and Karen know to savor every game.
"I'm gonna have to remind myself — starting with soccer, and I probably haven't done it yet — but just take a deep breath in before each game, check my surroundings more often, and just hopefully see a lot of smiles,” he said. “I think we're always encouraging, but as a coach-dad, sometimes I'm always looking for, 'Hey, you played good, but...' It's always 'but' — no buts this year, and just say, 'Hey, you played great tonight,' and whatever the outcome is, the outcome is.
"But I'm definitely not looking forward to the last game. ... I don't know. I mean, I don't even know why I'm crying.”
